'Twas the Night Before Judging

In honor of Recruiting.com's Best Blog of the Year contest...

'Twas the night before Judging, when all through the Net
Dave Mendoza was emailing, brow covered in sweat.
Inboxes were bulging with pleadings to vote,
"Six Degrees is the best," he hoped to promote.

Back on the West Coast, typing a thread,
Heather was flummoxed, "To the gym or to bed?
My readers are interested in what I consumed,
my crockpot, remote, or how my curls they are groomed."

Somewhere north in downtown Toronto,
Animal snorted, “JD, come here pronto!
“Mendoza is trying to win this whole thing,
he’s sent emails to everyone – he wants to be king.”

In the heart of the Apple, Manaster wondered aloud,
“Are my blogs a good thing or a hopeless black cloud?
ERE started with one and now there are twenty,
each has an ego but are all cognoscenti?”

Harry was talking to Jim in St. Looie,
“I just read an email from a blogger who’s screwy."
“Don’t worry,” said Jim, “he’s in for surprise;
viral marketing for votes will be his demise.”

"Now David! Now Jason!
Now, Harry and Heather!
On, Animal! On, Durbin!
It’s now or it’s never!
To the top of the list!
To the top of the heap!
Blog away! Blog away!
The losers will weep!"

The nomination period finally ended,
the list of top bloggers was truthfully splendid.
JD posted a thread on recruiting dot com
with a prelude by Animal with usual aplomb.

"Wait a minute people - hold on to your hats!
It’s a battle royale with bloggers and bats.
365 days of opines and fighting,
poking and prodding and far too much whining."

“Vote for your favorite in ten categories,
tell us why but be brief with your hideous stories.
Vote once and once only and try to behave,
and do not, above all, spam like El Dave.”

Mendoza, he read this and looked up with great sadness.
“They don’t want me to win, this all reeks of madness!
I’ll show them, I will; they can’t keep me down!"
and a look of great evil replaced his sad frown.

His knubby li'l fingers started furiously typing,
constructing an email filled through with hyping.
He knew he had one chance, one last chance to shine,
He laughed like Doc Evil, “It’ll be mine – yes, all MINE!"

Back in wet Redmond, still dressed in sweats,
Heather’s writing wildly – she's clearly upset.
“I started all this and that imp thinks he’ll win?
I’ve a few tricks up my sleeve,” she said with a grin.

JD raised his head, looking no more like Opie,
and to Animal said, "Stop acting so dopey!
We created this prize - we can’t possibly lose.”
Said Michael, “No way - we’ll just tighten the screws.”

David understood the numbers at hand,
sixty thousand ERE members were at his command.
“To lose is not possible, in fact, it’s appalling,
“Because winning blog-of-the-year is my higher calling.”

Durbin Media's full forces were pressed into play;
the winning plan was now well underway.
“It’s mine, all mine – it’s me they’ll admire.
I’ll be a Hall of Famer, just like Mark McGwire.”

Harry knew well multi-channel marketing’s power,
he’d be on the podium in the contest’s last hour.
As a sherpa his skills helped others climb high,
As a blogger he knew Mendoza would fry.

El Dave never knew that the judges were crooks,
the tallying of votes taking place in cooked books.
Sending email upon email, at least six times each day,
He neglected one thing – and that was to pray.

But the judges forgot they were not one - but six,
each filled with guile and their own bag of tricks.
While El Dave for months had cultivated his fans,
The judges' lack of gravitas ruined his plans.

Once all votes were counted Harry and El Dave didn't win;
neither did Animal, David, Jason, Heather or Jim.
It was the readers who won which in truth was quite right,

“So Happy Blogging to all, and to all a good night!”