Question: How does someone who is basically shy extract information from those formidable Gatekeepers?
Dear Shy,
Here are a few ideas for you.
First of all, you must realize that your body language is every bit as important as the words you use when you’re talking to that Gatekeeper. Why? It’s critically important that you be emotionally relaxed and you can’t be that unless you’re physically relaxed. Here’s a fast tip from the music industry for making yourself physically comfortable when you’re working:
Lift your chest. Place your hand at the bottom of your sternum and use it as a guide to lift the chest. When the chest is lifted correctly, the stomach muscles will lie flat; without having to suck it in, the back will be arched and the shoulders will be back in a more natural position. In body language, high shoulders indicate stress, while lower, relaxed shoulders indicate confidence and control.
Wherever you are, and whatever the situation, you must remember that your composure and body
language are the keys.
I've watched a lot of sourcers approach a LOT of Gatekeepers in my day. And I can usually tell within the
first few SECONDS if the sourcer knows what she's doing and if she's going to be successful.
Many if not most sourcers use submissive, apologetic body language and voice tones - they almost look as if they're pleading with the Gatekeeper to give them approval and they're nervous and self- conscious about the whole event.
In other words, most sourcers come across as WUSSIES.
The sourcers I know who are the most successful employ exactly the opposite techniques – they’re full of confidence, are up and are totally cool, calm, and collected. They often approach the Gatekeeper and begin the conversation like they would with an old friend.
There is no apologetic body language, and there are no signs of insecurity.
They aren't there to find out if the Gatekeeper is going to LIKE them, though most Gatekeepers DO immediately like great sourcers. On the contrary, the sourcer is “testing” that Gatekeeper to find out how savvy she is. This can usually be ferreted out in the first couple of sentences out of the Gatekeeper’s mouth and the sound and tone of her delivery.
Think about how you'd act if you were only interested in finding out if she's the kind of rare Gatekeeper that would spill all the beans just by you asking a simple question, “can you tell me who...?” rather than you being concerned by and anticipating her blow-back to your approach. When you act as if you expect her to tell you the information you want to know there’s a big shift in the approach isn’t there?
Of course there is.
Here's some homework for you:
Sit down and think carefully about the most common situations you find yourself in where you need to talk to Gatekeepers to get information from them.
Think about what's going on in their minds, where they're sitting when you call them, what they've just done and what they’re about to do next, who and what might surround them. This si the really important part - think about how they're probably feeling.
Now, come up with ten different ways that you could start a conversation in this situation.
Remember that YOU'RE the one who is trying to figure out if SHE is the kind of Gatekeeper who will give you information.
Once you've come up with ten good ones, pick your favorite, and mentally rehearse it. Don’t lose the rest because, rest assured they’ll come in handy sometime!
I realize that I'm asking you to do some work here, but it's so worth it. Trust me.
I'm going to give you one more hint...
Most of the sourcers I know who are great with Gatekeepers use the simplest of simple conversation
starters.
"Hi. My name is... can you help me?”
I realize that these sound simple, and they are. But they're so simple that they're disarming and that’s whjat you want to accomplish – you want to disarm her immediately. They’re not canned lines and they don’t sound like they’re being read. They help you figure out VERY QUICKLY if the Gatekeeper you're talking to is going to be helpful.
Remember, relaxed body language is Key! To repeat, lift your chest. Place your hand at the bottom of your sternum and use it as a guide to lift the chest. When the chest is lifted correctly, the stomach muscles will lie flat; without having to suck it in, the back will be arched and the shoulders will be back in a more natural position.
“Soft is the music that would charm for ever;
The flower of sweetest smell is shy and lowly”
~ William Wordsworth
Maureen Sharib is a seasoned telephone names sourcer, names sourcing since 1997. She and her husband Bob own the names sourcing firm TechTrak.com and Maureen telephone-names sources daily as well as teaches telephone-names sourcing in her online telephone names sourcing course "The Magic In The Method". She can be reached by email at Maureen at techtrak.com or by phone at (513) 899-9628. Maureen will come on-site to your company to teach telephone names sourcing to your sourcers.
http://www.techtrak.com/magicmethod/onsite_training.htm
I can also be found here at the new networking site, Naymz. Be sure to check out my "other groups" while you're there!
http://www.naymz.com/search/maureen/sharib/239854?utm_source=profile_visit_notification&utm_medium=email
Learn telephone names sourcing techniques that work!
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